Wednesday, October 16, 2019

5 Ways the Internet Has Probably Ruined Me

I can buy Christmas gifts naked in bed in like, five minutes. Glad it's the thought that counts and not effort or time.



Whatever badly-thought-out, prejudiced opinion I have, I can find a massive subculture that supports that opinion and has websites dedicated to it as an eternal truth.



Even small amounts of quiet time for introspection are too overwhelming. I’ve started pulling out webcomics to glance at while waiting for crosswalk lights to change. Anything but consider myself and my flaws, please.



The level of stalking that used to take three days and access to a microfiche (look it up, you’ve seen it in every horror film) now takes three minutes and I can do it while on the toilet. Goodbye closure, hello “checking in” just to “see how they’re doing” with their “new girlfriend”.




















I create short, slang-filled blogs for my own amusement and then force them out into the world when neither they nor the audience is ready. Then I link it to my freelance profile to try and convince other people to let me write things for them. Thus, the reign of my words expand and you shall never escape my thoughts.



The internet sure is convenient, though! So that’s nice.

Tag urself, I’m #shortslangfilledblogs

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